Staying True to Yourself in Residency
If I’m being totally honest, it took me almost a year of being out of residency and medical training to truly start feeling like myself again. I started picking up old hobbies again, started reading more, watched more than just reality TV, and started to enjoy cooking again. I remember thinking it just felt good to feel like MYSELF.
Fast forward more years than I would like to acknowledge and I have started to mentor pre-meds, med students, residents and fellows on how to not lose yourself in the first place while in medical training. Don’t get me wrong - it’s hard. Medical training will take absolutely everything from you that you are willing to give. But here’s the thing - when you’re your best self, you’re also going to be the best doctor. Remember that like a lot of things in this life, medical training is a marathon NOT a sprint.
When I start mentoring others in the medical field, I typically start by asking them to tell me about one thing is that brings them joy (outside of medicine and their immediate family). The answers I’ve gotten have been endless: spending time with my friends, trying a new restaurant, going to a workout class, pottery, cooking a nice dinner for my spouse.
The next thing I ask them is how often they do that and what barriers exist for it. The answers to this question are not surprisingly all the same. I don’t have time and I am way too exhausted.
We then go on to a nice, long brainstorming session about how to fit in the time for wellness into an already packed schedule. Because yes, whatever brings you joy is wellness. I find the same solutions coming up over and over again - so I’ll share them with you all.
Find the one chore you can’t stand doing and outsource it. Do you hate cleaning? Book a cleaning service every month. Hate grocery shopping? Use InstaCart or Thrive Market. Hate laundry? Get a laundry service. You get the gist. Not only does this free up time, it also frees up energy. Which is huge. Bonus points if you sign up for our wellness giveaway - it gives you the chance to win laundry and cleaning services, spa days and so much more every month.
Make small, easy to achieve goals. You’ve got enough going on, and this is not another thing to find yourself stressing over. Starting with reading 10 minutes a week, then three times a week until its every night before bed. Bonus points for non-medical books, I personally love the Reese Witherspoon Book Club.
Combine activities. Do you love to try new wines and also want to see some friends? Invite friends over for a low-key wine night. Want to get in an exercise class? Ask a buddy to come along and try a new coffee shop afterwards. One of my mentors gave me this advice when I was in medical school and it was really life changing for me.
Leave work at work (as best you can). This can be so challenging when residency and fellowship are so many hours of your week, and so many of your friends are also probably in medicine. When you’re with friends, limit your work talk to 30 minutes, and then move on! Talk about all the other things going on in your lives (or in the lives of reality TV stars). When you’re not on call, turn that work phone off when you get home. Make yourself DND on Epic when you’re on vacation.
If you try any of these, I would love to hear how they work for you!!
Share this with all your besties in medicine.
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